We want to be on the same path together. We want to be deeply compatible, lifelong companions, and have the love that lasts a lifetime.
Prayer, as the ultimate love language, can make that happen. Have you ever been so mad at your husband that the last thing you wanted to do was pray for him? So have I. If He asks us to pray for our enemies, how much more should we be praying for the person with whom we have become one and are supposed to love?
But how do we get past the unforgiveness and critical attitude? The first thing to do is be completely honest with God. In order to break down the walls in our hearts and smash the barriers that stop communication, we have to be totally up- front with the Lord about our feelings. He already knows the truth. If so, He then has a heart with which He can work. If you are angry at your husband, tell God.
I confess my anger, hurt, unforgiveness, disappointment, resentment, and hardness of heart toward him. Forgive me and create in me a clean heart and right spirit before You. Give me a new, positive, joyful, loving, forgiving attitude toward him. Where he has erred, reveal it to him and convict his heart about it. Lead him through the paths of repentance and deliverance.
Help me not to hold myself apart from him emotionally, mentally, or physically because of unforgiveness. Where either of us needs to ask forgiveness of the other, help us to do so. Where there is behavior that needs to change in either of us, I pray You would enable that change to happen. As much as I want to hang on to my anger toward him because I feel it is justified, I want to do what You want.
I release all those feelings to You. Give me a renewed sense of love for him and words to heal this situation. Pray for your husband every day for a month using each one of the thirty-one areas of prayer focus I have included in this book.
Pray a chapter a day. Ask God to pour out His blessings on him and fill you both with His love. Well, God is asking. And it is never more true than in a marriage, especially when it comes to the words we say. There is a time to speak and a time not to speak, and happy is the man whose wife can discern between the two. Anyone who has been married for any length of time realizes that there are things that are better left unsaid. A wife has the ability to hurt her husband more deeply than anyone else can, and he can do the same to her.
They can only be forgiven and that is not always easy. I stuffed my feelings inside. After our first child was born, I became increasingly vocal. But the more I voiced my objections and opinions, the more he resisted and the more we would argue. Whatever I said not only accomplished nothing in the area I wanted it to, it had the opposite effect.
It took me a number of years to learn what millions of women have learned over the centuries. The safeguard you have with prayer is that you have to go through God to do it. When you pray, God reveals anything in your personality that is resistant to His order of things. If I do need to say something, I try not to just blurt it out. It took me a long time to figure this out, however. For some reason it struck a nerve. The more I talked about it, the more irritated Michael became.
I stopped talking about it and started praying. I also asked my prayer group to pray along with me. Even though it took longer than I would have liked, it did happen. There was a lot at stake and she knew it. The Lord will always give us words to say, and show us when to say them if we ask Him. Timing is everything.
That hurts people. Our goal must not be to get our husbands to do what we want, but rather to release them to God so He can get them to do what He wants. Distinguish carefully between what is truly right and wrong. Or pray about them and then, as the Lord leads, reveal them for calm discussion. There are times when we are just to listen and not offer advice, to support and not offer constructive criticism. By all means you must clearly communicate your thoughts and feelings. If you do have to say words that are hard to hear, ask God to help you discern when your husband would be most open to hearing them.
Pray for the right words and for his heart to be totally receptive. This is especially true when talking has ceased altogether and every word only brings more pain. I wish I had learned earlier to pray before I spoke. My words too often set up a defensive reaction in my husband that produced harsh words we both regret.
He received my suggestions as pressure to do or be something, even though I always had his best interests at heart. It had to come to him from God. The Bible says a wife can win over her husband without saying anything, because what he observes in his wife speaks more loudly than what she tells him.
God says He speaks of things that are not as though they were. You can do that, too. No matter how long you have to pray for your husband to come to know the Lord, even if it takes his whole life, the time will not be wasted. In the meantime, whether your husband is a believer or not, you can still pray all the prayers in this book for him and expect to see significant answers to them.
Even if you are the only one working and your husband stays home to keep the house and tend the kids, you will still be expected to see that the heart of your home is a peaceful sanctuary—a source of contentment, acceptance, rejuvenation, nurturing, rest, and love for your family.
On top of this, you will also be expected to be sexually appealing, a good cook, a great mother, and physically, emotionally, and spiritually fit. Ask the Lord to show you how to make your home a safe haven that builds up your family—a place where creativity flows and communication is ongoing.
Ask God to help you keep the house clean, the laundry done, the kitchen in order, the pantry and the refrigerator full, and the beds made.
These are basic things a man may not compliment his wife on every day or ever , but he will notice if they are not done. My husband may not look in the cupboard for a lightbulb or a battery for months. But when he does, he wants it to be there.
Nor does he want to come home late from work one night and find that there is no bread for a sandwich. I do my best to make sure it is there. I ask God to help me maintain a house that my husband is pleased to come home to and bring his friends.
My first home was small and had secondhand furniture I bought from yard sales. I painted the entire place myself with the help of a girlfriend and made it look attractive. It just takes some thought and a little care.
Part of making a house a home is allowing your husband to be the head so you can be the heart. Trying to be both is too much. God placed the husband as the head over the family, whether he deserves it or not and whether he rises up to take his position or not. They work together. If your husband is to be the head of the house, you must allow him that headship. If you are to be the heart of the home, you still must take the steps necessary to do so, even if you are a major contributor to the financial support.
Trying to reverse that keeps a constant struggle going. It never minimized his headship or caused me to usurp his position. It was something he did for me. There were times he needed me to work so he could rest. If you are working as hard as he is to bring home a paycheck, the responsibilities should be shared in the home. Ask God to show you about that. Some effort must be put into maintaining them. I once heard a radio talk show where a woman called in to complain to a popular psychologist that her husband told her he no longer found her attractive.
Even the most gorgeous women in the world do much to maintain their attractiveness. Queen Esther was one of the most beautiful women in her country and she still spent a year beautifying herself before she met the king. We have to ask ourselves the same question. Do I see that my internal self is cleansed and rejuvenated with regular exercise? Do I preserve my strength and vitality with a healthful diet?
Do I dress attractively? And most important: Do I spend time alone with God every day? I guarantee that the more time you spend with the Lord, the more radiant you will become.
Pray for God to show you what steps to take and then enable you to take them. Invite the Holy Spirit to dwell in you and your home. Letting Go of Expectations Shortly after we were married, my husband called from work and said he wanted me to prepare a certain chicken dish for dinner.
I want lamb chops. This was not an isolated incident. Similar ones happened far too frequently. I finally learned that it did no good to be angry, hurt, or resentful. That only made matters worse. I realized it was healthier for both of us if I rearranged my expectations. If Michael was able to join us, it was a pleasant surprise. I recount how he sometimes helps with the household chores and the cooking. He is faithful and does not give me reason to doubt it.
He is a believer who goes to church, reads his Bible, prays, and has high moral standards. He loves me and our children. He is a good and generous provider.
Of course there are some basics that should be agreed upon before the wedding date, such as fidelity, financial support, honesty, kindness, basic decency, high moral standards, physical and emotional love, and protection. The pressure to do that and fulfill your dreams at the same time can be overwhelming to a man.
Instead, take your needs to God in prayer and look to Him for the answers. Let go of as many expectations as possible. Instead, ask God to make any necessary changes. Accept your husband the way he is and pray for him to grow. Then when change happens, it will be because God has worked it in him and it will be lasting.
Your greatest expectations must be from God, not your husband. Loss of respect seems to precede loss of love and is more hurtful to a man than we realize. The consequences of losing respect for your husband can be very serious. In another example, Queen Vashti refused to go to the king at his command.
The king was giving a feast for his friends, he was in a party mood, and he wanted to show off his beautiful wife. All he asked of her was that she put on her royal clothes, don her royal crown, and make a royal appearance to the people he was entertaining.
She declined, knowing full well it would be humiliating for him. The result was that Vashti lost her position as queen. She not only wronged her husband, the king, but the people as well. The price is too high. There is a wall in my heart that I know was erected as a protection against being hurt.
But I am ready to let it come down so that my heart can heal. I confess the times I have shown a lack of respect for him. I confess my disrespectful attitude and words as sin against You. Show me how to dismantle this barrier over my emotions that keeps me from having the unconditional love You want me to have. Tear down the wall of hardness around my heart and show me how to respect my husband the way You want me to.
It will enable you to say something positive that will encourage, build up, give life, and make the marriage better. Love is diminished if we dwell on the negatives. Love grows if we focus on the positive. Ask God to give it to you. When you are praying for yourself—his wife—remember this model of a good wife from the Bible. It says she takes care of her home and runs it well. She knows how to buy and sell and make wise investments.
She keeps herself healthy and energetic and dresses attractively. She works diligently and has skills which are marketable. She is giving and conscientiously prepares for the future. She is strong, solid, honorable, and not afraid of growing older.
She speaks wisely and kindly. Her children and her husband praise her. She supports her husband and still has a fruitful life of her own which speaks loudly for itself Proverbs Shall we? Prayer Lord, help me to be a good wife.
Take my selfishness, impatience, and irritability and turn them into kindness, long-suffering, and the willingness to bear all things. Take my old emotional habits, mind-sets, automatic reactions, rude assumptions, and self-protective stance, and make me patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle, and self-controlled.
Take the hardness of my heart and break down the walls with Your battering ram of revelation. Give me a new heart and work in me Your love, peace, and joy Galatians I am not able to rise above who I am at this moment.
Only You can transform me. Show me where there is sin in my heart, especially with regard to my husband. Help me to put aside any hurt, anger, or disappointment I feel and forgive him the way You do—totally and completely, no looking back.
Make me a tool of reconciliation, peace, and healing in this marriage. Enable us to communicate well and rescue us from the threshold of separation where the realities of divorce begin. Help me to create a peaceful, restful, safe place for him to come home to. Grow me into a creative and confident woman who is rich in mind, soul, and spirit. Make me the kind of woman he can be proud to say is his wife.
I lay all my expectations at Your cross. I release my husband from the burden of fulfilling me in areas where I should be looking to You. Help me to accept him the way he is and not try to change him. I realize that in some ways he may never change, but at the same time, I release him to change in ways I never thought he could.
I leave any changing that needs to be done in Your hands, fully accepting that neither of us is perfect and never will be.
Only You, Lord, are perfect, and I look to You to perfect us. Teach me how to pray for my husband and make my prayers a true language of love.
Where love has died, create new love between us. Show me what unconditional love really is and how to communicate it in a way he can clearly perceive. Bring unity between us so that we can be in agreement about everything Amos May the God of patience and comfort grant us to be like-minded toward one another, according to Christ Jesus Romans Help us to pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another Romans I pray that our commitment to You and to one another will grow stronger and more passionate every day.
Help me to understand his dreams and see things from his perspective. Reveal to me what he wants and needs and show me potential problems before they arise. Breathe Your life into this marriage. Make me a new person, Lord. Help me see him with new eyes, new appreciation, new love, new compassion, and new acceptance. Give my husband a new wife, and let it be me. And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses.
For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. MATTHEW Through wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches.
The problem is that Kim is not content to bear the entire burden of supporting the family on her shoulders indefinitely, and Bill has been pursuing his dream for seventeen years with nothing to show for it. Steven is working himself to death. He can never rest and enjoy the success of his labor. He seldom spends time with his family, and his teenagers are fast approaching adulthood. These are extreme examples of how a man can relate to his work.
On one hand is laziness—avoiding work out of selfishness, fear, lack of confidence, depression, or apprehension about the future. In other words, a lazy man will never get anywhere, he will never have anything, he will have a rough road ahead, and it will ultimately destroy him.
In other words, workaholism is draining and pointless. Neither extreme promotes happiness and fulfillment. Only a perfect balance between the two, which God can help a man find, will ever bring that quality of life. What causes a man to go to either extreme can be, oddly enough, the same reason: fear.
He needs to be appreciated and he needs to win, and his work is often a means of seeing both happen. It frightens him to think he may never experience either. If he is doing work that is demeaning to him, he feels devalued as a person.
If his work is not successful, he feels like a loser. Gary, his father, and his grandfather all had difficulty making a living. In fact, it was very late in each of their lives before they were even able to discern what they were supposed to be doing. They went from job to job without any clear leading.
They struggled financially. None of them had parents who prayed for them to have their gifts and talents revealed, to know the calling of God on their lives, to have doors opened to them, and to become all they were created to be. History tends to repeat itself without the intervention of God.
Their careers may not take off immediately, but they have a sense of purpose and destiny that propels them in the right direction. There is needless floundering, disappointment, doubt, and despair as he tries to carve out a place for himself.
If your husband had that kind of start, your prayers can change his life. You can pray for his eyes to be opened to see what God wants him to do, and where God is leading. Your prayers can help him feel appreciated and encouraged enough to recognize he has worth no matter what he does. You can assure him that God has uniquely gifted him with ability and talent and has something good ahead for him.
Then pray for God to reveal it and open a door of opportunity which no man can shut. Your prayers can pave a path for him. My husband, who is a songwriter and record producer, said he felt my prayers have prevented him from working with the wrong clients. He has never worked with anyone who is difficult, weird, evil, or unsuitable, which is nothing less than a miracle in his business. He knew I always prayed that God would lead him to the right people and remove from his path those who would be trouble.
While our prayers cannot ensure a trouble-free road for our husbands, they can certainly steer them clear of many problems. If your husband is a hard worker, make sure he has times of rest and enjoyment—to do things that entertain him and give him a reprieve from the weight of a lifetime of supporting a family.
Men need periods of refreshing. May his labor bring not only favor, success, and prosperity, but great fulfillment as well. If the work he is doing is not in line with Your perfect will for his life, reveal it to him. Show him what he should do differently and guide him down the right path.
Give him strength, faith, and a vision for the future so he can rise above any propensity for laziness. May he never run from work out of fear, selfishness, or a desire to avoid responsibility. Give him the ability to enjoy his success without striving for more. Help him to excel, but free him from the pressure to do so. I pray that You will be Lord over his work, and may he bring You into every aspect of it.
Open up doors of opportunity for him that no man can close. Develop his skills so that they grow more valuable with each passing year. Show me what I can do to encourage him.
I pray that his work will be established, secure, successful, satisfying, and financially rewarding. Let him be like a tree planted by the stream of Your living water, which brings forth fruit in due season. He will stand before kings; he will not stand before unknown men. Will you set your eyes on that which is not? For riches certainly make themselves wings; they fly away like an eagle toward heaven. Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?
Is he giving or miserly? Is he thankful or envious of others? Is money a blessing or a curse? Is he wise or reckless with what he has? Is he in agreement with you as to how it is to be spent, or does your marriage exhibit financial strife?
Nothing puts more pressure on a marriage than financial irresponsibility, lack of money, and huge debt. Only when we recognize that all we have comes from God and seek to make Him Lord over it can we avoid the pitfalls that money, or the lack of it, brings. Of course I was never able to do that because the gods I chased after were distant, cold, and remote.
And this depressed me all the more because I was raised by a mother who was distant, cold, and remote, not to mention abusive, frightening, and cruel.
It was later determined that she was mentally ill, and I have since forgiven her for all that I suffered at her hand. Nevertheless, the memories of my childhood eventually snowballed into an avalanche of pain that became so unbearable that I ended up being suffocated by my own hopelessness and crushed into suicidal despair.
But it was here at the lowest point in my life, when I was 28 years old, that I learned who God really is and received Jesus as my Savior. This began a process of deliverance, healing, and restoration, the likes of which I had never dreamed possible.
From the time I received the Lord and began to feel His life working in me, I could see the common thread in all those other religions and practices I had dabbled in previously. But the God of the Bible did. He is the one, true, living God. And when we find Him and receive Him, His Spirit comes to dwell in us. By the power of His spirit, He transforms us from the inside out and miraculously changes our circumstances and our lives.
I also learned that He is a God who can be found. A God who can be known. A God who wants to be close to us. That's why He is called Immanuel, which means "God with us. If I could sit down and talk with you in person about your life, I would tell you that if you have received the Lord, the answer to what you need is within you. That's because the Holy Spirit of God is within you, and He will lead you in all things and teach you everything you need to know.
He will transform you and your circumstances beyond your wildest dreams if you will give up trying to do it on your own and let Him do it His way and in His time. This is not about striving to be good enough to get to God, for there is no way any of us can be. This is about letting all of the goodness of God be in you.
It's about drawing closer to God and sensing Him drawing closer to you. This is about an intimate walk with God and the wholeness that will be worked in you because of it. I wanted to know how women most wanted to be prayed for.
The number one personal need of all women surveyed was that they would grow spiritually and have a deep, strong, vital, life-changing, faith-filled walk with God. I eventually stopped taking the survey because the results were always the same.
I got the point! I'm sure that you, like me and many women, want a deep, intimate, loving relationship with God. You wouldn't be reading this book if you didn't. You long for the closeness, the connection, the affirmation that who you are is good and desirable. But God is the only one who can give all that to you all of the time. Your deepest needs and longing will only be met in an intimate relationship with Him. No person will ever reach as deeply into you as God will.
No one can ever know you as well or love you as much. That insatiable longing for more that you feel, the emptiness you want those closest to you to fill, is put there by God so that He can fill it.
God wants us to want Him. And when we realize that it's Him that we want, we become free. We are free to identify the longings, loneliness, and emptiness inside of us as our signal that we need to draw near to God with open arms and ask Him to fill us with more of Himself.
But this deep and intimate relationship with God that we all desire and can't live without doesn't just happen. It must be sought after, prayed for, nurtured, and treasured. And we must continually seek after, pray for, nurture, and treasure it. If you follow the Lord for only what He can do for you, your walk with Him is shallow.
If you love Him enough to ask Him what you can do for Him, then your relationship is growing deep. If you only pray to God when things are tough or you need something, then your walk with Him is shallow. If you find yourself praying to Him many times a day just because you love to be in His presence, then your relationship is growing deep. If you get mad at God or disappointed in Him when He doesn't do what you want, then your walk with Him is shallow.
If you can praise God no matter what is going on in your life, then your relationship with Him is growing deep. If you love God only because of what He does, then your walk with Him is shallow. If you love and reverence Him for who He is, then your relationship with Him is growing deep. If you think you have to beg God or twist His arm to get Him to answer your prayers, then your walk with Him is shallow. If you believe that God wants to answer the prayers you pray in line with His will, then your relationship with Him is growing deep.
Spending Time Alone With Him We can never draw close to God and get to know Him well, or develop the kind of intimate relationship we want, unless we spend time alone with Him. It's in those private times that we are refreshed, strengthened, and rejuvenated. It's then we can see our lives from God's perspective and discover what is really important. That's where we understand who it is we belong to and believe in.
God has so much to speak into your life. But if you don't draw apart from the busyness of your day and spend time alone with Him in quietness and solitude, you will not hear it. Jesus Himself spent much time alone with God. If anyone could get away with not doing it, surely it would have been Him. How much more important must it be for us?
I know finding time alone to pray can be difficult. Especially when the enemy of your soul doesn't want you to do that. But if you will make it a priority by setting a specific time to pray daily, perhaps writing it in your calendar the way you would any other important date, and determine to keep that standing appointment with God, you'll see answers to your prayers like never before.
Remember, if you haven't been praying much, you can't expect things to change overnight. It takes a while to get the enormous ocean liner of your life turned around and headed in a different direction.
It doesn't immediately reposition itself the moment you begin steering. In fact, you may hardly see any changes at first. It's the same way with prayer. Prayer can turn your life around, but it doesn't always happen the moment you utter your first words. It may take a time of continued prayer before you actually see the scenery change. This is normal, so don't give up. You will soon be heading full speed in a new direction. Far too often people give up just before their breakthrough into the realm of answered prayer.
Remember, this trip is not a mini-vacation tour around the harbor, it's a lifelong voyage to meet your destiny. Giving up is not an option. Naming Names Do you ever have trouble remembering names? Especially when I meet a large number of people at one time. I can remember faces and names separately, but I don't always put the right ones together. And that can get me into trouble. With God it's a different situation. He has only one face, but many, many names. But if we don't know all of His names, we may not understand all the aspects of His character.
God has literally hundreds of names. Sometimes, though, it seems we often have trouble just remembering a few of the basic ones. We may forget one just when we need to remember it. Or we may remember Him as our Comforter, but forget that He is our Deliverer. We might think of Him as our Protector, but fail to remember Him as our Healer. Some people never think of God beyond being their Savior, which in itself is more than we deserve. But God wants to be even more than that to us.
He wants us to know all the aspects of His character because the way we recognize God will affect the way we live our lives. Each of God's names in the Bible represents a way He wants us to trust Him.
Do you trust Him to be your Strength Psalm ? Is He your Peace Ephesians ? Is He your Refiner Malachi ? Your Wisdom 1 Corinthians ? Your Counselor Psalm ? Your Resting Place Jeremiah ? Each of His names is sacred, and we must treat each one as such. When I worked in the secular entertainment world in Los Angeles, I heard the word "Jesus" a hundred times a day, spoken as a curse word by people with no reverence, love, or understanding of Him. It wasn't until I received Jesus that I realized exactly how much of a curse word that name was when it was used profanely.
Taking God's name in vain brings a curse on whoever uses it in that manner because it breaks one of the Ten Commandments. It also violates God's greatest commandment, which is "you shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength" Mark No one who loves God uses His name in vain. However, this same word—"Jesus"—when spoken in love by one who reverences Him, has great power in it.
Power to save, deliver, heal, provide, protect, and so much more. There is also great power in each one of God's names, and when spoken with faith, love, understanding, and reverence, it brings a blessing and increases your faith.
For example, God's name is always a safe place to run to any time you need help. If you are sick, run to your Healer. If you can't pay your bills, run to your Provider.
If you are afraid, run to your Hiding Place. If you are going through a dark time, run to your Everlasting Light. By speaking His name with reverence and thanksgiving, you invite Him to be that to you.
Often there is so much we don't have in our lives simply because we do not acknowledge God as the answer to that need. How can you be healed if you don't acknowledge God as the Healer? In the following list of God's names, I have included only But there are hundreds more in His Word. Though He is one God, there are so many dimensions to Him that in order for us to comprehend them all, He has given Himself many names. It's the only way we, who are so small, can begin to understand Him, who is so great.
I suggest that every time you come across another name for God in the Bible, underline it or jot it in the margin or add it to a list. It will remind you of who God wants to be to you. As you read the following list, invite God to be each one of these names to you in a new, real, and life-changing way. Healer Malachi 2. Redeemer Isaiah 3. My Strength Psalm 5. Shelter Isaiah NLT 6. Friend Matthew 7. Advocate Hebrews NLT 8.
Restorer Psalm 9. Everlasting Father Isaiah Love 1 John Mediator 1 Timothy Bread of Life John Hiding Place Psalm 3 Everlasting Light Isaiah Resting Place Jeremiah Spirit of Truth John Eternal Life 1 John Lord of Peace 2 Thessalonians Living Water John Husband Isaiah Helper Hebrews Wonderful Counselor Isaiah The Lord Who Heals Exodus Hope Psalm God of Comfort Romans If you will go through this list of names periodically and speak each of them out loud, thanking God for being that to you, you'll be amazed at how your faith will grow and how much closer to God you will feel.
I long to dwell in Your presence, and my desire is for a deeper and more intimate relationship with You. I want to know You in every way You can be known. Teach me what I need to learn in order to know You better. I don't want to be a person who is "always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth" 2 Timothy I want to know the truth about who You are, because I know that You are near to all who call upon You in truth Psalm I am open to whatever You want to do in me.
I don't want to limit You by neglecting to acknowledge You in every way possible. Today I especially need to know You as put in a name of the Lord. I believe You will be that to me. God, help me to set aside time each day to meet with You alone.
Enable me to resist and eliminate all that would keep me from it. Teach me to pray the way You want me to. Help me to learn more about You. Lord, you have said, "If anyone thirsts, let him come to Me and drink" John I thirst for more of You because I am in a dry place without You.
I come to You this day and drink deeply of Your Spirit. I know You are everywhere, but I also know that there are deeper manifestations of Your presence that I long to experience. Draw me close so that I may dwell in Your presence like never before. James I will pray the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may abide with you forever—the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees Him nor knows Him; but you know Him, for He dwells with you and will be in you.
John It is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom. Luke Until now you have asked nothing in My name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full. John Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful. That is, you and I are not perfect. No one is perfect. None of us has arrived. None of us is incapable of sin. None of us is without problems. None of us have walked so long with the Lord that we know it all and therefore have nothing to learn.
None of us is so complete that we don't need anything from God. None of us has it all together. It's out in the open. Please don't think I said this because I believe you need to know it. To the contrary, I believe you already do know it. I said it because I want you to know that we all know it. We know it about ourselves and we know it about each other. Therefore, we can be completely honest with ourselves about ourselves.
I don't want you to feel when reading this book that you have to live up to some impossibly high standard for your life. This book is not about living up to a standard. It's about letting God become your standard. It's not about trying to make something happen for yourself. It's recognizing that you can't make anything happen, but you can surrender your life to God and let Him make things happen. It's not about finding ways to avoid God's judgment and feeling like a failure if you don't do everything perfectly.
It's about fully experiencing God's love and letting it perfect you. It's not about being somebody you are not. It's about becoming who you really are. Women all over the world want to live fruitful lives. They want to dwell in God's grace while still obeying His laws.
They want to be unshakable in God's truth yet moved by the suffering and needs of others. They want to know God in all the ways He can be known, and they want to be transformed by the power of His Spirit. But they are often hard on themselves when they don't see all these things happening on a daily basis.
They are quick to observe all they are doing wrong and slow to appreciate all they are doing right. For that reason, I want you to look upon this idea of cleansing your heart not as a judgment that your heart is dirty, but as God's call for you to get completely right before Him so He can bring all the blessings He has for you into your life.
See it as God preparing you for the important work He has ahead for you to do. In order to accomplish this, you have to examine your life closely. You have to be brave enough to say, "Lord, show me what is in my heart, soul, mind, spirit, and life that shouldn't be there. Teach me what I am not understanding. Convict me where I am missing the mark. Tear down my arrogance, pride, fear, and insecurities, and help me to see the truth about myself, my life, and my circumstances.
Expose me to myself, Lord. I can take it. Enable me to correct the error of my ways. Help me to replace lies with truth and make changes that last. Perhaps more courage than many of us have at the moment. If you are hesitant to let the Lord expose your heart because of what He might reveal, then ask Him to give you the courage you need.
In order to see positive changes happen in your life, you have to be open to the cleansing and stretching work of the Holy Spirit. You have to allow Him to expose your heart so you won't be deceived about yourself and your life. Then be willing to do these two things: 1. Confess to God any sins of thought or action that He shows you.
Repent of the things you have just confessed. True Confession Don't think just because you are not a serial killer or have never robbed a bank that you don't have any sin to confess. Don't think because you have walked with the Lord for a number of years and go to church every Sunday morning and Wednesday night, and to all prayer meetings in between, that you have nothing for which you need to repent.
Sin doesn't have to be glaring and obvious in order for it to be sin. For example, have you ever doubted that God can do what He promises in His Word? Doubt is a sin. Have you ever said anything about a person to someone else that isn't exactly flattering?
Gossip is a sin. Have you ever avoided someone because you thought they might ask something of you that you didn't want to give? Selfishness is a sin. Have you ever had an unloving attitude toward another person? Whatever does not come from love is a sin. Sin is hard to avoid percent of the time. That's why confession is crucial. When we don't confess our sins, faults, or errors, they separate us from God.
And we don't get our prayers answered. When we don't confess our sins, we end up trying to hide ourselves from God. Just like Adam and Eve in the garden, we feel we can't face Him. But the problem with attempting to hide from God is that it's impossible. The Bible says that everything we do will be made known. Therefore whatever you have spoken in the dark will be heard in the light, and what you have spoken in the ear in inner rooms will be proclaimed on the housetops" Luke What a frightening thought!
If each of us will have to give an account, the quicker we get it straight with God the better. In fact, the sooner we deal with the sins we can see, the sooner God can reveal to us the ones we can't. And God only knows how much of that there is residing in each of us. There is always a consequence for sin. King David described it best when he wrote of his own unconfessed sin: "When I kept silent, my bones grew old through my groaning all the day long.
For day and night Your hand was heavy upon me; my vitality was turned into the drought of summer" Psalm I remember having resentment toward my husband for words he said that hurt me deeply. As long as I held on to the hurt and resentment, it made me feel physically ill. I didn't want to confess it because I thought my feelings were justified and he was the one who was wrong.
But I finally realized that all sin is sin, so I confessed my resentment to God as sin—and the moment I did, the feeling of sickness in my body left. For my iniquities have gone over my head; like a heavy burden they are too heavy for me. My wounds are foul and festering because of my foolishness" Psalm Life is hard enough without us having to carry around old, dry, sick, weak bones. Nothing is heavier than sin. We don't realize how heavy it is until the day we feel its crushing weight bringing death to our souls.
When time permits only one, brief prayer a day. A two night reflection on Advent by the Online Ministries team. Pre-Praying with Advent Fr. Larry Gillick, S. Greg Carlson, S. Advent Audio Retreat with Fr. Another Advent Audio Retreat with Fr. Advent Videos:. A rich and powerful season of the Church year. W e often miss Advent's power because these December weeks are full of secular Christmas parties and preparations for Christmas.
Many religious groups and spiritualists believe demons get their power from negative energy. Using a few simple tools and the proper rituals, you can expel demons from your home too. With these basic rituals, you can keep yourself and your home demon-free. Talk to a friend, family member, your doctor, or a therapist. If you've been hearing strange noises, experiencing an unusual change of mood, or witnessing other bizarre phenomena at home, you might be worried that you're dealing with a demon.
While there are likely logical explanations for these things, you can still try cleansing your home by lighting some incense or candles. Additionally, if there are any objects that are putting off bad vibes or energy, take them out of your home so they're out of sight. You should also try to keep your home as clean as possible since some people believe demons thrive in a dirty environment. For more advice, like how to perform a banishing ritual, scroll down.
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Burn sage to clear out demons. Make sure all the doors and windows are open so the demons can get out, then light the sage and let it burn for 30 seconds before you blow the flame out.
Allow the sage to smolder and the smoke to cleanse the space of negative energy. Say a prayer to get rid of the demons. Whatever your religion, praying out loud can help you get rid of them. Say the prayer over and over as you move about the space so the demons are driven out. Chant your own prayer or mantra that repeats a positive intention while also banishing any demons.
This is a place of light and love. Bang pots and pans to scare away any demons in your home. Some people bang pots and pans together at the beginning of a new year to scare away the ghosts from the previous year. But you can also drive out any demons in your home by walking around the entire place banging pots and pans loudly.
Sprinkle holy water around your home. Many people believe holy water will drive away demons. Call your local church and ask them if you can have a bottle of holy water.
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